Forgive Me
by HelloMrJones
Summary: "Oh, Jack... I am so, so sorry..." The Doctor looked down at the man on the concrete street, a blood halo around his face. The Doctor owed him. And he'd fix this, he had to. - AU, eventual Janto and CoE fixit some OCs later on
1. Chapter 1

_AN: Hi guys! I am a horrible person because I write to many fanfics at once! It should be easier now that I have my own 'computer' but I still have a small attention span, so just bear with me! _

_This is because I am in such denial of CoE and __**FOR CRYING OUT FUCKING LOUD**__ Jack deserves a bloody respite! _

**.:~:.**

"This isn't right!" The Doctor shouted. He was whizzing around the TARDIS controls with a panicked look on his face.

Not far away, Amy and Rory clung to the railing for dear life, but their balance was still thrown off by the TARDIS's wild spinning.

"What do you mean it 'isn't right' Doctor?" Amy shouted, her teeth clenched in effort as a particularly violent shift threw her balance. Next to her Rory remained silent.

The Doctor, not paying attention to her, ran around the controls once more to the screen, clinging to the bottom of it as he read the data flashing across the screen. What he saw made his face go pale.

"... No..."

'Oh, no, no, no, no, NO! You are not doing this today, sweetheart!' He thought vehemently at the TARDIS. She only groaned in defiance. He gave her a wicked glare that turned to wide eyed shock as the TARDIS threw herself to full stop.

All the passengers on board yelped as they were thrown to the ground, Amy landing next to Rory whose groan was drowned out by the screaming engines. When all was past, the Doctor stood up and went to the monitor with panic and dread written all over his face.

Amy gave him a wary and suspicious look from the floor, slowly pushing herself up. "Doctor?" She was about to ask what was happening but was cut off quickly.

"Not now Amy darling, we are in a bit of a spiff because SOMEONE DECIDED TO LAND IN THE MIDDLE OF BLOODY CARDIFF!" He yelled at the ceiling. The redheaded girl gave him a wide eyed look with furrowed brows.

"Why are we in Cardiff?" She asked cautiously. Behind her, Rory stood and sat in the chair next to the railing, taking deep breathes.

The Doctor glanced at her before going back to the controls.

"It's the TARDIS. She's known for doing this sometimes, but of ALL the places I do NOT want to be, it's here!" Again his shouting was directed at the roof. There was no response.

With a helpless sigh, the Doctor stepped back from the controls and looked at Amy with the look he usually wore when things weren't going his way. "I'm afraid, dear Amy, that we are stuck here..."

Amy fixed him with a suspicious look. "What's so wrong with Cardiff?" She doubted there _could_ be anything wrong with the place. From what she'd heard in the past from her school friends was that it was a sleepy city.

The Doctor merely rolled his eyes. "Everything. There is everything wrong with this place. There's a rift in space and time running right through the city." The man made a wide slicing gesture over his head to emphasize his description.

Rory, looking up from where his head had been in his hands, then gave the doctor a confused glance. "Sorry, not getting what you mean by a 'rift'. What does that mean?" His hand moved in a questioning move.

From behind the controls the Doctor heaved a small sigh. "It means, Rory, that things - alien things- fall through the rift and land throughout the city." He pushed himself away from the controls and moved towards the door, silently brooding.

Amy moved over to stand next to Rory, who pushed himself from the chair. She looked over at him, concern shining in her eyes. In response, he wrapped his arm around her waist, holding her close.

After a few minutes in these positions, the Doctor turned abruptly, looking up at the pair with an unreadable expression. "Alright kids, lets visit the neighbors." He clapped his hands together and wrung them.

Amy straightened from her position, and looked at the Doctor with a furrowed brow. "Neighbors, Doctor?"

The man sighed heavily, and shifted on his feet. "Yes... The rift causes problems, as you could have guessed and... Years ago an agency was created to control that. Torchwood, it was-is called... I... May know their leader. But right now I'm not sure if he'll be right pissed to see me or not." Giving them a weak smile he moved to the doors.

Behind him Rory and Amy moved with him, hand-in-hand. The Doctor hesitated outside the door of the TARDIS. There was a far away look in his eye, one that concerned Amy - like he was in another place completely. Hesitantly she reached out her hand and placed it on his shoulder.

"Doctor? Are you alright?" Her brow furrowed as he jumped slightly and turned around to look at her quickly before facing forwards again.

"Hm? Oh, yes, fine Amy, dear." Exhaling quickly, he opened the the latch to the door, but stopped before he opened it. "Oh! Don't be surprised to have guns aimed at you, Torchwood is very weapons friendly."

Amy stared after him in wide eyed shock as he opened the door and stepped out quickly. Next to her, Rory gripped her hand tighter as they moved to the door. Pulling it opened slowly, Amy took in the scene around them.

In front of them was a large copper roofed building with words silhouetted in stencil and large glass doors extending around it. The ground beneath their feet was made of a whitish stone that extended all around them to a small viewpoint bay area. Amy let go of Rory-who was also looking around in amazement- to spin around.

She stopped and gasped slightly at the _huge_ water tower before them. "Wow."

Behind her the Doctor stared around with his hands in his pocket, his face an expression of indifference. He was silent, caught up in his own thoughts. He knew what day it was-or what day had passed- from the newspaper of the lady sitting on the far bench, but he couldn't bring himself to acknowledge it.

There was a reason the TARDIS had brought him here, and now he knew why. Leaning his head back the Doctor looked up at the cloudy sky above Cardiff.

_'You owe him. You know you do.' _That voice that sounded oddly like Martha's whispered in the back of his mind. His jaw clenched. _Martha... Voice of a nightingale... _His lips quirked at that.

With a long suffering sigh, he looked back in front of him for a moment before turning around to his two current companions. A small chuckle built in his chest at their open faces of shock and awe. They had obviously never been here before.

Turning back around, the Doctor spoke to them before walking forward. "Come on, kids. Neighbors are waiting!" He didn't have to look behind himself to know that they were following.

.:~:.

_'He's dead... He's dead... He's gone... He's left...' _No matter how he put it, that was all Jack could think about. It was a mantra that didn't take any conscious thought.

Ianto, _his_ Ianto... Dead. Gone. Cold in the morgue downstairs. Pale, unmoving, on a metal slab... Dead.

_'I wish I were dead...'_ It was no longer a wish for his immortality to disappear so he could _live _and _then_ die... No, he just wanted to be **dead.** He was done with the world. Done with its cruelties and injustices. All of its pain... of his pain...

_'I love you.' _

_ 'Don't...' _

How could he have said that... _'Don't...' _What the hell kind of response is that? How could he have said that as the person who grounded him was lying in his arms _**dying**_...

Looking down at the city life below him, Jack wallowed in the stabbing emptiness and pain of his existence. It wasn't a life anymore, it hadn't been for weeks. Or days... He didn't know. He'd been sitting on this ledge for days- not moving.

Sometimes he thought he'd jump- but then he'd have to explain as he'd come gasping back to life. He didn't want to come back anymore. Loosing Ianto was worse than all of his previous losses combined. Worse than Estelle, worse than Rose... And _**definitely **_worse than the Doctor.

He wasn't really a loss though-no! He'd just come in when it's too late, when everything's over with and _apologize. _Or he wouldn't come at all... Either way- Jack didn't see him meeting that man again. Ever.

_'... Perhaps I should jump... Just this once...' _Looking down at the street life below, Jack saw a man in a suit with a cup of coffee in his hands cross the road. He couldn't help himself a small bitter smile that quickly turned to a sob as he remembered Ianto, how he would prepare those suits so finely because Jack loved him both in one and out of one...

It was with this though that Jack pushed off his greatcoat, draped it over the side of the building, and moved to the alley side of the building.

_'No use getting it ruined. Ianto would kill me...' _If only...

Closing his eyes Jack let the pain he'd been keeping somewhat at bay flow over him.

_The bone shattering realisation as he'd woken up that first time with Ianto wrapped in his arms. _

_ The emptiness he felt as he revived yet again without his beautiful Welshmen, not even gasping for breath because it wasn't worth it unless Ianto was breathing too. _

_ The loneliness that overwhelmed him when the Hub was rebuilt and he spent his first night lying awake in his bunker. _

Tears streamed down Jack's face as he propelled himself forward. His last thought before the blissful darkness took him was of hot houses and weevil hunts.

When he landed on the ground a small smile quirked his lips, but lines of sorrow and grief remained, forever etched in his face.

**.:~:.**

_AN: I'm going to go crawl in a very small hole and cry now..._


	2. Chapter 2

The Doctor felt it, the shift in time that could only result in a death not meant to happen. Events in the future coming undone, timelines splintering and lives never created. His hand flew to his head and a slightly pained cry came from his lips. It was like someone had pushed needles through his skull to the center of his brain.

The Time Lord instincts that had been ingrained in to him since his creation came forth as his eyes flew open. Before him timelines flew past, weaving in and out of each other, ending and fading. One stood out, brighter than any, golden fibers flowing quickly and sporadically, parts of it shattering then rebuilding.

It was mesmerizing, repulsive, an abomination and he _needed_ to find out what it was. His mind wasn't thinking about the hands that were shaking him or the red haired girl trying to catch his eye- no all it was concerned with was the enthralling stream of time that was flickering and glowing brighter than the sun.

"... Amazing..." He breathed. His core instinct drew him to follow it, and that he did. Time Lord instinct was a horrific and wonderful thing at the same time.

He didn't know how long he followed it for, felt like seconds but was probably longer. Finally it arched down- and ended.

Something in the Doctor snapped back as he noticed that brilliant light end. There, on the ground in a pool of blood, was none other than Captain Jack Harkness himself. His face was slack, but the Doctor could still see the lines of pain that marred his face. It broke his heart to see Jack in such a state.

Taking a deep breath the Doctor took a few steps towards the body and knelt down next to it, avoiding the blood that was spread under him. His throat constricted as he saw, really _saw _the events of the weeks past. Tears stung at his eyes, and the Doctor allowed one to fall.

"Oh, Jack... I am so sorry..." A wave of grief struck the Doctor, and he collapsed to sit next to his friend, taking his fractured skull into his hands. Deft fingers stroked over the bloodied skin Jacks temple as scratches began to heal.

A scream from behind him alerted him to another presence in the alleyway that he had found Jack. He whipped around, looking at the mouth of the alleyway, and relaxed slightly as he saw it was Amy and Rory, not some civilian. Amy, who was wrapped in Rory's arms, had her hand to her mouth and face pulled in horror.

She seemed to take a few breathes, staring at the scene with wide eyes. "D-doctor...?" her voice shook. The man could only stare at her sadly then turn back to his mending friend. The blood remained to coat his features, dripping down his neck to stain the shirt.

"His name was Jack..." he monotones. A gasp from the duo behind him goes unregistered, he's too caught up in the time line searing through his brain. Such grief, and despair... The Doctor struggles to breath.

"Oh god... Doctor..." Rory's voice comes from behind.

Just at that moment, Jack comes back to life. But something is wrong. The gasping breath of resurrection isn't there, the trademark that tells you Jack is back is gone. He just opens his eyes, inhales, and stares up.

He sees a man with floppy hair and a bow tie leaning over him.

_Those eyes... _Rage floods through Jack. He would _never _forget those eyes. He doesn't give any warning, grabbing the man and pinning him to the ground with a throaty growl.

"_Where were you?_ _Where. The hell. Were YOU!_" His hands are fisted in the Doctors coat, his legs straddling his waist, and his body shaking with a mixture of rage and grief. Below him the Doctors eyes are wide with both fear and guilt.

"Jack-"

"_NO! _Of all the times I've _needed_ you..." Tears are streaming down his face, and suddenly the fight leaves his body. He buries his face in the Doctors shoulder, and choking sobs wretch from his body.

Grief fills the Doctor, and he does the only thing he can in this position. He wraps his arms around the shaking immortal and holds the man close, murmuring apologies in his ear.

At the mouth of the alleyway, Amy grips Rory's hand tightly, fighting her own tears at the scene of heartbreak before them.

.:~:.

Jack can't believe it. The Doctor is here. But he's late, far too late to help him, to help Ianto. Entering the TARDIS isn't as exhilarating as it should be. He looks around, noting the new design, but stays quiet about it.

Jack can feel the Doctors eyes on him, but pointedly ignores him in favour of sitting on the the floor, leaning against the metal railing. His back protests and he can feel his joints crack, still recovering from his jump.

The other two who had found him with the Doctor were still by the door, watching as the Doctor approached him with hesitant footsteps. Jack clenches his fist in anger and swears if the Doctor tries to touch him he will punch the other man. The Doctor, sensing this, stops his advancing a few feet away from the figure with slouched shoulders and tired eyes.

"Jack..." His voice cracks. He knows there is nothing he can do to console the man, to try and excuse himself for not being there. There is no excuse, he didn't know. The 456 were not part of Earths history.

The man sitting on the ground looks up at him, and the Doctor almost gasps at the _age_ in those eyes. "What...?" Jack's voice is small, too small for the man the Doctor had last seen.

"How old are you?" The questions slips past his lips before he can stop it. Jack gives him a cold and empty smile.

"Two thousand one hundred and seventy four years old... Give or take." The number is spat out, as if it's a curse. The Doctors eyes go wide.

"How...? Two thousand years?" A mirth-filled laugh crawls its way up Jacks throat.

"Spent that long buried under Cardiff." The smile is back, and it scares the Doctor at how unhinged it is. "Fifteen feet from Cardiff Castle, can you imagine." The lips quirk in an empty manner. "A few feet over with the foundation and I would still. Be. There." His eyes are empty as they stare up at the Doctor.

The Doctor is honestly afraid. Afraid of what has changed Jack so much, afraid of that off look in his eyes, and afraid of how much of this he could have prevented. "Oh, Jack... I'm so sorr-"

"_Don't. You. Dare._" Jack snarls, glaring at the Doctor with ice in his eyes. "DON'T apologise. Because if you do then I'll have to forgive you... And I'm not there quite yet.


End file.
